Notes from Yanga

I was looking for something to write to cover up that last post so that the two people who read this won't judge me and I found this, discarded drafts from the Yanga series I wrote last year:

There's stigma attached to being single, but it's not real.

Your value is not defined by the lack of ring on your finger.

30 is significant for many things: it can be a great wake-up call for the woman that was hoping she'd have married been married by now.

Since you didn't want to be too intimidating to your husband, which was why you never took a significant job or never did a masters, now that you're staring thirty in the face perhaps you should start making different choices. Feel free to write a business plan. Feel free to do things on your own: go to the cinema. Go to a restaurant. Travel.

And for you who were waiting to get married to become more spiritual, you've reached thirty. Perhaps it's time to start booing up to God.

It's hard to be single - when you want to be in a relationship.

Don't lose touch with your married friends. 

Have a good single friend you can moan with. 

Stay busy: work, volunteer, hobbies, Church, visiting friends, traveling.

Be yourself: if conforming to societal dictates of what a woman should be like was going to get you a husband, you'd be married already.